Bad Relationship advice from "Experts"

Thinking about marrying someone? Ask these questions

More below.

The real question is whether any of these "Experts" have ever had a successful marriage, or even a successful relationship.

The questions:

1. What do you like most about living together? 

Oh brother. If you are living together, you are doing it wrong. No, I am not a prude, but living together is a trial, an attempt to find out if it will work. What happens is you look for reasons it cannot work. Over time, this corrodes the relationship. 

Marriage needs to be view as if it is an arranged marriage without the opportunity to leave. Marriage is difficult, and it is easy to find reasons to leave. Don't start out in a position with your mind already primed with reasons to leave, you likely will.

2. What makes you happiest in a relationship with me?

Happiness is always the wrong metric, for pretty much everything. Happiness is nothing more than a temporal emotional release caused by the temporary lifting of the weight of the normal vicissitudes of life. You go to a movie, it takes you away from the bills, the problems, work, the kids, and all the rest. You leave happy, even elated. Then a few minutes later reality intrudes, and the happiness fades.

The proper metric is joy, or contentment, or a similar state, not happiness. 

3. What are you saving for?

Leading questions like this will lead your potential spouse to answer the question in a way you are more likely to approve of, rather than to tell you the truth. Here they are likely to realize they need to be saving for something, and since you are a potential spouse that goal should be "spousey." So they will likely say something like, marriage, or family, or children. 

You got worse than bupkis with that response, you got Hillarian misdirection. 

What you need to know are your potential mates long term goals, and ultimately whether you, and your goal can fit together.

4. What about religious differences/similarities?

Whut? Have these exerts dated for even a few minutes? This is presumably advice for people who are seriously considering marriage. Is it even possible to spend many months, or preferably a few years dating someone, and not know this information. If so, you are simply doing dating wrong. 

By all means ask this question, but really, dating is a mechanism through which you find out about other people, their goals, desires, actions, hypocrisies, loves, hates, and everything in between. These relationship experts seem to be providing advice for fools just off the turnip truck, obliviously entering into a marriage with someone they know nothing about. 

5. Where would he rather spend Christmas?

You should know this just by dating long enough to know this factually, without the other needing to answer a question.

6. What role will children play in your life?

Oh, come on. This is not a question to ask once you are thinking about marrying someone. I knew this about every potential partner before I decided the dating relationship had legs. Dating always starts only as an attraction, with potential. The potential becomes something more concrete only if the basic longterm relationship/marriage features are met, you know like whether or not the potential spouse want kids, family, etc. This should be addressed very early in any relationship with potential. If your date shies from this question, they are not serious, and only view you as an enjoyable interlude. 

7. What about your sexual desires?

Ask this question. Men need to realize that how women act when they are fishing for a man is unlikely to be the same way they will act once they have caught a man. Women need to realize that men will want to continue to have sex at least as often as they did while dating.

This is a problem area since both are operating under false flag, and with a false understanding. 

8. What do you do when you are angry?

If you do not know this you are not done dating. You need to date until you have established a basic full emotional gamut with your potential spouse. Anger, love, friendship, frustration, euphoria, you need to observe these as responses, not ask them as questions. This is what dating is for, us it. You are not done until you know these things.

9. How is your relationship with your mother and sister?

Perhaps like many other of these questions you could ask this after you already know the answer through observation, but really, if you have to ask, the marriage is likely doomed. How often do sociopaths, psychopaths, narcissists, and other flawed persons provide honest answers to questions like this? Right, never. This is an observational issue, not one for questioning. 

10. Are we going to keep our independence?

I am, you need to decide for your self. This is a question you ask yourself, not the other.

Such is the state of "expert"relationship advice.